In my Kula newsletter this week (not Kula Diaries), I referenced a new ‘experiment’ that I’ve been working on… although maybe it is less of an ‘experiment’ and more of a practice. I’m trying to do one thing at a time. Which means, that when I’m making my breakfast sandwich… I’m making my breakfast sandwich. Or, if I’m sitting here typing on my computer, I’m just sitting here typing. Where am I not? I’m not in my head, attempting to contemplate things that I am not doing… at this exact moment.
I’m going to be sharing more about this ‘experiment’ soon… but I’m curious about your thoughts on it. Is this something that you struggle to find balance with? Or do you have any practices that help you stay more in the present moment?
P.S. This week’s post is coming out on Sunday, as usual, and it’s all about my recent trip to The Badlands… and another trip I took to The Badlands… 29 years ago. I hope you really enjoy it and I wish all of you a really beautiful weekend.
I am wondering if anyone has experience with reading deprivation week from "The Artist's Way" (also called media deprivation week). It was a big shift for me to not listen to podcasts or audiobooks for a whole week ("silent" walks!) and to avoid books and articles!
Oh, I haven't heard of reading deprivation week... but I try to make ALL of my walks 'silent walks'... I feel like when I wake up in the morning, my mind is a 'blank slate', and I don't want to instantly fill it with podcasts or audiobooks. I will usually include my morning dance practice every day - but that doesn't happen until around 1.5 hours after I have started walking. Are you still taking your silent walks? What have you discovered exists in the place that was previously filled by audiobooks?
I focused on doing silent walks a few weeks ago but I have so many things I want to listen to that I like to take my podcasts on walks too.
Not sure I noticed too much of a difference given how much my mind naturally wanders (whether podcasts or silence)… I am not familiar with the blank slate feeling you describe!
I’ve thought about rather than doing one or the other (podcasts or silence) to change it up once in a while, when it feels right.
As I have a lot of your kula diaries emails to catch up with I post here pretty late 🙂
Isn't 'doing one thing at a time' pretty close of the mindfulness principle? Being in the present moment (hello Eckart 👋). To me it is all the same.
For instance when I wash the dishes with a busy mind, the task is boring, it only feels like a chore, and I am eager to already be somewhere else, doing something else. But if I am only washing the dishes, then I am fully aware of why I am doing it, grateful for the purpose those dirty dishes served, and I can just enjoy doing a good job washing them 🙂
You are absolutely correct - doing one thing at a time is exactly the same as being in the present moment... sometimes changing the language around a mindfulness concept can be helpful... as each person might resonate with a different 'version' of the same idea. I completely agree with you that even things like doing chores can be fun if we are totally present with them. I think Eckhart actually talks about how the sensation of 'boredom' only exists because we wish that we were somewhere other than where we are (which is, of course, a somewhat silly thing to wish... when you actually think about it - ha!). I will wash my dirty dishes today and send you grateful energy as I do so. Thank you so much for reading and taking the time to share such thoughtful words - I truly appreciate you and also love that I have an audience in France. Have a beautiful day! Love, A
This is blowing my mind! I don’t think I’ve ever tried doing one thing at a time 🤯. So counterintuitive to think it will help me get more done, but I’m excited to give it a try!
Let me know how it goes - I'm going to be sharing my experience with it either this week or next. I'm definitely not a pro by any means... but I'm trying - ha!!!
I second that comment about eating! I am always either reading or scrolling during meals. I am conscious of it, but it’s so hard to break the habit. When my daughter is home, we don’t do this; we talk through meals. But I’m alone a lot now. I’m guilty of the multi-tasking at work too. I get easily distracted by a hundred thoughts at once. So I keep to-do lists so I don’t forget anything. This is a great topic! Can’t wait to hear more!
Thank you so much for sharing Chris! Eating alone and 'doing nothing' is a weird thing, isn't it? It's like our brains feel the need to be CONSTANTLY occupied by something. I've always been so intrigued by the question: What could happen if I didn't fill that space with something? When I quit my social media addiction a few months ago, this Substack was born in its place -- which is something far more creative and genuine than Instagram will ever be. I'm definitely not perfect at doing one thing at a time, but I'm noticing that my nervous system REALLY likes it. Can't wait to write more about it soon!
I just turned 65 so I am one of the last Boomers. My generation came up with the idea of multi-tasking. We had so much to do with our careers and families and outsider activities that we were sure that we could master doing more than one thing at a time. (I repeatedly forgot the cooking pots when we were camping. Repeatedly.) There were articles written, symposiums hosted, seminars attended to help us to master this simple approach to life. You were seen as a failure if you couldn’t effectively multi-task. I had lists of my lists. I was a failure despite all my attempts.
Subsequent research has shown that multi-tasking does not work. When trying to do several things at once, you end up with nothing done well. In my life, I have given up on multi-tasking. Have you ever tried to feed an infant while holding a conference call for work and packing for a trip? Doesn’t work.
Now I focus on one thing at a time. I feel better knowing that whatever I did, I did with total focus on the one item in the list. I am happier. The recipient of my focus is happier. I feel actual contentedness at the end of the day. Yes, contentedness. I feel content. Enjoy your focus on just one thing at a time.
SO beautifully said!! While I fall into the category of 'offspring' of Boomers... I feel like a lot of the values I learned from the adults in my life were centered around 'work and productivity' ... not around 'being' or 'presence'. As such, I similarly dove into a life of 'doing' ... and found that my nervous system was continually strained and I was never really happy where I was. Similar to you experience... I actually get MORE done when I focus on doing one thing at at time... and give my total presence to that thing, instead of trying to rush through 'as much as possible' all at once. Plus, I'm happy when I'm doing those things. I really think that it isn't so much what we do... but how we are when we are doing it. We can bring something different to each moment when we give it our full attention. Thank you so much for sharing your beautiful words!!
My worst struggle is when I’m eating. I’m reading the news while eating breakfast or playing Wordle while eating lunch. I would like to get better at just eating and taking time to be thankful for the nourishment. This is a good reminder to keep trying!! Thanks Anastasia for offering this space amd these reminders!
You are so welcome Kathleen! When I was in college, I felt very uncomfortable to 'just eat'... I always brought a book with me to the cafeteria, and immediately started reading the second that I was eating. I didn't have smartphones or social media back then... but I imagine that if I did, I would have been nose-deep in Instagram lol. These days, my husband and I eat meals together... lately, I've been reading a passage from A Course in Miracles before we eat (because it also gives my breakfast sandwich time to cool down so I don't scald my mouth - ha!)... and then we both try to simply eat and enjoy it. As I've started this experiment, I've been trying to actually notice the texture of my sandwich... the bread... the saltiness... and it has been so much more enjoyable instead of shoving the food in my mouth just so I can get to the 'next' thing. Admittedly, I'm absolutely NOT perfect at this. But, committing to making it an 'experiment' has reinvigorated my devotion to just being where I am. It's SO easy to forget, isn't it? Thank YOU so much for sharing and thank you for being here. I think we are all much better when we know that we are all travelling on a similar trail. Sending you love, friend!
I really struggle with this! Some of it is my job - where I have to task switch all the time, so the thought of doing only one thing seems very counterproductive.
Currently, I'm typing this, but pseudo looking at the graphs on the other monitor.
Even when I go on my daily 15 minute walk, I'm usually listening to a podcast.
It's SO challenging!! You are not alone. As an entrepreneur, I often feel overwhelmed and completely demoralized by the things I 'have to do', if I am being honest. Most of these things are tasks or scenarios that I don't even have any control over in this specific moment - just worries and anxieties about things that 'could happen'. Ugh!
On my morning walks, I find myself diving deep into thinking about my daily to-do list or having pretend conversations in my head and telling myself imaginary stories about scenarios that haven't even happened. I'm getting better and better at 'catching' myself. It's amazing what happens when you do. It's like a weight is lifted and you can enjoy the most 'normal' things... the sound of the keys on the keyboard... or my cat, who is currently attempting to sabotage my typing efforts by nudging me with his head. It's a funny thing being HERE... but always thinking I need to be somewhere else.
Recently, I've been asking myself the question: If I always need to be somewhere else... when will I ever arrive? What I'm finding is that I'm actually already there.... I'm just missing it sometimes. It's been eye opening for me to really focus on one thing at a time (although I do love listening to audiobooks and podcasts too - ha!).
I am wondering if anyone has experience with reading deprivation week from "The Artist's Way" (also called media deprivation week). It was a big shift for me to not listen to podcasts or audiobooks for a whole week ("silent" walks!) and to avoid books and articles!
Oh, I haven't heard of reading deprivation week... but I try to make ALL of my walks 'silent walks'... I feel like when I wake up in the morning, my mind is a 'blank slate', and I don't want to instantly fill it with podcasts or audiobooks. I will usually include my morning dance practice every day - but that doesn't happen until around 1.5 hours after I have started walking. Are you still taking your silent walks? What have you discovered exists in the place that was previously filled by audiobooks?
I focused on doing silent walks a few weeks ago but I have so many things I want to listen to that I like to take my podcasts on walks too.
Not sure I noticed too much of a difference given how much my mind naturally wanders (whether podcasts or silence)… I am not familiar with the blank slate feeling you describe!
I’ve thought about rather than doing one or the other (podcasts or silence) to change it up once in a while, when it feels right.
As I have a lot of your kula diaries emails to catch up with I post here pretty late 🙂
Isn't 'doing one thing at a time' pretty close of the mindfulness principle? Being in the present moment (hello Eckart 👋). To me it is all the same.
For instance when I wash the dishes with a busy mind, the task is boring, it only feels like a chore, and I am eager to already be somewhere else, doing something else. But if I am only washing the dishes, then I am fully aware of why I am doing it, grateful for the purpose those dirty dishes served, and I can just enjoy doing a good job washing them 🙂
Keep rocking Anastasia
All the best from France ✌️
Guillaume
Guillaume,
You are absolutely correct - doing one thing at a time is exactly the same as being in the present moment... sometimes changing the language around a mindfulness concept can be helpful... as each person might resonate with a different 'version' of the same idea. I completely agree with you that even things like doing chores can be fun if we are totally present with them. I think Eckhart actually talks about how the sensation of 'boredom' only exists because we wish that we were somewhere other than where we are (which is, of course, a somewhat silly thing to wish... when you actually think about it - ha!). I will wash my dirty dishes today and send you grateful energy as I do so. Thank you so much for reading and taking the time to share such thoughtful words - I truly appreciate you and also love that I have an audience in France. Have a beautiful day! Love, A
🤗💚✨
This is blowing my mind! I don’t think I’ve ever tried doing one thing at a time 🤯. So counterintuitive to think it will help me get more done, but I’m excited to give it a try!
Let me know how it goes - I'm going to be sharing my experience with it either this week or next. I'm definitely not a pro by any means... but I'm trying - ha!!!
I second that comment about eating! I am always either reading or scrolling during meals. I am conscious of it, but it’s so hard to break the habit. When my daughter is home, we don’t do this; we talk through meals. But I’m alone a lot now. I’m guilty of the multi-tasking at work too. I get easily distracted by a hundred thoughts at once. So I keep to-do lists so I don’t forget anything. This is a great topic! Can’t wait to hear more!
Thank you so much for sharing Chris! Eating alone and 'doing nothing' is a weird thing, isn't it? It's like our brains feel the need to be CONSTANTLY occupied by something. I've always been so intrigued by the question: What could happen if I didn't fill that space with something? When I quit my social media addiction a few months ago, this Substack was born in its place -- which is something far more creative and genuine than Instagram will ever be. I'm definitely not perfect at doing one thing at a time, but I'm noticing that my nervous system REALLY likes it. Can't wait to write more about it soon!
I just turned 65 so I am one of the last Boomers. My generation came up with the idea of multi-tasking. We had so much to do with our careers and families and outsider activities that we were sure that we could master doing more than one thing at a time. (I repeatedly forgot the cooking pots when we were camping. Repeatedly.) There were articles written, symposiums hosted, seminars attended to help us to master this simple approach to life. You were seen as a failure if you couldn’t effectively multi-task. I had lists of my lists. I was a failure despite all my attempts.
Subsequent research has shown that multi-tasking does not work. When trying to do several things at once, you end up with nothing done well. In my life, I have given up on multi-tasking. Have you ever tried to feed an infant while holding a conference call for work and packing for a trip? Doesn’t work.
Now I focus on one thing at a time. I feel better knowing that whatever I did, I did with total focus on the one item in the list. I am happier. The recipient of my focus is happier. I feel actual contentedness at the end of the day. Yes, contentedness. I feel content. Enjoy your focus on just one thing at a time.
SO beautifully said!! While I fall into the category of 'offspring' of Boomers... I feel like a lot of the values I learned from the adults in my life were centered around 'work and productivity' ... not around 'being' or 'presence'. As such, I similarly dove into a life of 'doing' ... and found that my nervous system was continually strained and I was never really happy where I was. Similar to you experience... I actually get MORE done when I focus on doing one thing at at time... and give my total presence to that thing, instead of trying to rush through 'as much as possible' all at once. Plus, I'm happy when I'm doing those things. I really think that it isn't so much what we do... but how we are when we are doing it. We can bring something different to each moment when we give it our full attention. Thank you so much for sharing your beautiful words!!
My worst struggle is when I’m eating. I’m reading the news while eating breakfast or playing Wordle while eating lunch. I would like to get better at just eating and taking time to be thankful for the nourishment. This is a good reminder to keep trying!! Thanks Anastasia for offering this space amd these reminders!
You are so welcome Kathleen! When I was in college, I felt very uncomfortable to 'just eat'... I always brought a book with me to the cafeteria, and immediately started reading the second that I was eating. I didn't have smartphones or social media back then... but I imagine that if I did, I would have been nose-deep in Instagram lol. These days, my husband and I eat meals together... lately, I've been reading a passage from A Course in Miracles before we eat (because it also gives my breakfast sandwich time to cool down so I don't scald my mouth - ha!)... and then we both try to simply eat and enjoy it. As I've started this experiment, I've been trying to actually notice the texture of my sandwich... the bread... the saltiness... and it has been so much more enjoyable instead of shoving the food in my mouth just so I can get to the 'next' thing. Admittedly, I'm absolutely NOT perfect at this. But, committing to making it an 'experiment' has reinvigorated my devotion to just being where I am. It's SO easy to forget, isn't it? Thank YOU so much for sharing and thank you for being here. I think we are all much better when we know that we are all travelling on a similar trail. Sending you love, friend!
I really struggle with this! Some of it is my job - where I have to task switch all the time, so the thought of doing only one thing seems very counterproductive.
Currently, I'm typing this, but pseudo looking at the graphs on the other monitor.
Even when I go on my daily 15 minute walk, I'm usually listening to a podcast.
It's SO challenging!! You are not alone. As an entrepreneur, I often feel overwhelmed and completely demoralized by the things I 'have to do', if I am being honest. Most of these things are tasks or scenarios that I don't even have any control over in this specific moment - just worries and anxieties about things that 'could happen'. Ugh!
On my morning walks, I find myself diving deep into thinking about my daily to-do list or having pretend conversations in my head and telling myself imaginary stories about scenarios that haven't even happened. I'm getting better and better at 'catching' myself. It's amazing what happens when you do. It's like a weight is lifted and you can enjoy the most 'normal' things... the sound of the keys on the keyboard... or my cat, who is currently attempting to sabotage my typing efforts by nudging me with his head. It's a funny thing being HERE... but always thinking I need to be somewhere else.
Recently, I've been asking myself the question: If I always need to be somewhere else... when will I ever arrive? What I'm finding is that I'm actually already there.... I'm just missing it sometimes. It's been eye opening for me to really focus on one thing at a time (although I do love listening to audiobooks and podcasts too - ha!).