AMA with AMA: Answering YOUR questions!
The 5-second rule... ice cream... and hitchhiking!
Dear Kula Diaries,
I hope that all of you are having a beautiful day!
This past weekend, I had the opportunity to go on a trip to visit a friend that I’ve known for over 30+ years — so that was really wonderful! When I decided to stop trying so hard a few months ago, I also made a vow to myself that I wasn’t going to put off doing the things that I wanted to under the guise of being ‘too busy’. So, what did I do? I made reservations to fly to Texas to visit a very special friend.
A few years ago, I would have likely convinced myself that I was too busy and didn’t have enough time to travel … but, I’m realizing that if I need things to be easy and perfect in order to do something… I’ll probably never do anything at all.
I spent a lot of time on the plane meditating (which turned into sleeping)… and had fun dancing in a new place and spending time with people that are really important to me.
While I was in Texas, I also met up with my cousin — whom I hadn’t seen in many years… which was also amazing, and I even designed her some special Kulas with her art on them! We went to a tea house called the West China Tea House, which was an incredible experience — and it inspired me to find a local tea house in Washington (which I did)… I’m now signed up to take a tea class in a couple of weeks!
It’s funny all of the fun things that happen when you open yourselves up to the present moment — and just allow the loving jello of the universe to take you along its gentle current. I hope all of you are having a beautiful week - I’m so happy to be here answering some questions, and so grateful that all of you are here too!
Ok… time for some answers! If you’d like to submit a question or comment, you can always do that anonymously at this link.
Dear AMA,
What’s your take on the five-second rule?
I’m aware of two five-second rules, so I’ll address both of them.
First — if food falls onto the ground… is it OK to pick it up and eat it? My answer to that question is: it depends. If, for example, the food was ice cream… my answer would usually be ‘no’. However, if I dropped a grape onto the ground… I might consider picking it up and eating it. The other important things to consider are:
Is the floor cleaned regularly?
Do you live in a household that takes their shoes off at the door… or do you wear your shoes inside the house on a regular basis (just imagine some of the public bathrooms you’ve walked in…)?
Do you have pets?
What is the surface of the floor that the food has fallen onto?
Believe it or not, I read an article awhile ago that stated that carpet actually transferred less bacteria onto food than a floor like wood or tile… due to a decreased surface area. I don’t know about you, but I don’t think I want to dig into a piece of anything that has landed on carpet.
Really, it all comes down to your personal preference and comfort level. For instance, I eat raw cookie dough all the time — and I love it each and every time. Other people, however, are absolutely terrified of raw dough. If somebody was really worried about the cleanliness of a skittle dropped on the floor, I’d say: Don’t eat it. But, if you don’t really care and you feel reasonably certain that an animal didn’t poop in that spot… be bold, and go for it.
Ok — second 5 second rule (and the one that I think you were probably referring to) is a ‘rule’ that was coined by motivational speaker and author, Mel Robbins. The 5-second rule was something that she implemented during a very low point in her life — she was struggling with an alcohol problem… financial issues, etc… and she could barely get out of bed. After watching a rocket launch countdown.. 5…4…3…2…1… she had an epiphany that she could use the same principal to disrupt her own mind activity - which was ‘telling her’ unhelpful things that were preventing her from making a lasting change. So, she woke up in the morning and did a countdown… 5…4…3…2…1… and, instead of hitting the snooze button 17 different times… she woke up. By using this technique, she had a complete life transformation.
I came across Mel Robbins many years ago — during the early stages of my own ‘transformation’ — and while I’ve not been consistent about using her specific technique, I do utilize similar techniques in order to ‘override’ my brain’s natural tendency to ‘think my way’ into problems and limiting beliefs. Our brain is a computer that has been thinking the same things… over and over… for a very long time. The things that we believe (specifically things about ourselves and about the world that we live in) might be real thoughts that exist in our mind, but they are not necessarily true. Learning how to recognize this… and how to disrupt the unhelpful patterns that keep us stuck is absolutely critical for making any type of life change. For instance — if you have a belief that money is scarce and that you are limited in your ability to acquire it … that belief will perpetuate itself (and confirm itself) through your life experience — until you learn how to recognize the thought pattern and redirect it to somewhere else. A lot of the 5 second rule is simply that: a way to disrupt patterns that are so familiar that we don’t even realize we are doing them. These unhelpful patterns are completely unconscious — which means that when we are ‘in the thick of them’ — we typically have no conscious awareness that we are doing, ‘that thing we do’.
The 5-second rule is an amazingly effective tool at disrupting an unhelpful pattern… but it’s difficult to use if you are so unaware of your own behavior and thought patterns that you don’t even know you are overthinking. Imagine, if you will, my state of mind in the early phases of having the idea about Kula Cloth:
At first, I thought that the idea for the intentionally designed pee cloth was amazing. Then, I went back home from my backpacking trip… and what did I start to do? I started thinking. Did I know that I was doing this? Nope, I had no clue — I slipped right into my old, unconscious thought patterns without having any clue that they were ‘taking over’ my mind. Simply put: I believed they were true. And so, in my unconscious state, I told myself things like:
You can’t afford this
You won’t be successful
Nobody will buy it
This is a dumb idea
Somebody else is already doing it
All businesses fail
You’re going to embarrass yourself and disappoint your father
And the list went on… and on. I didn’t consciously think those thoughts. It was almost like my brain was thinking me. I was overtaken by the thoughts as real and true, which meant that I did not have the level of self-awareness to even recognize that I had dipped into an unhelpful pattern that could be disrupted.
For me, it was only through the process of meditation that I began to realize that my thoughts might exist in my brain… but they might not be true.
So, while I think that the 5 second rule is a really amazing habit — I believe that it would be most effective if it were also combined with the practice of meditation, which is a way that you can slowly and gradually develop the muscle of presence and self-awareness in your life. From a place of recognition and understanding that, 'my thoughts are not me’, true change is possible when we learn to disrupt our patterns.
Personally, I use a similar strategy to disrupt my own brain patterns — because we all have brain patterns that are on repeat ad nauseum. When I notice that I’m doing that thing I do… I’ll simply stop, take some deep breaths… re-direct myself… and sometimes spend time writing down things that feel better to me… or focusing on the feeling of my breathing… or I’ll dance… anything to get out of my head. Our minds are powerful tools, but they are also the place that good ideas go to die sometimes. When we can disrupt the harmful patterns that have limited our access to our infinite possibility — then, and only then, can we learn to harness the unbelievable creative power of everything that are are meant to bloom into.
If counting to 5 works for you — I’d say go for it. Start with meditation, and learn to quiet your mind and see your thoughts. Remember: you are the awareness of the thinker. The thoughts are taking place in the blank space of the consciousness which is you. How amazing is that? You are a conscious, living, breathing, amazing, loving being and as you begin to see and feel the unbelievable amount of goodness that lives within you… you’ll slowly become your own biggest uplifter. The old, exhausted thoughts about what wasn’t possible for you… will gradually shift into everything being possible. And not only will you start to realize that in your own life — but you’ll share it with others.
Dear AMA,
How do you feel about ice cream?
Woah. Loaded question.
What’s funny about this question is that I hadn’t eaten ice cream for a long time… and then last weekend, at Captain Joe’s house, we had cherry ice cream for desert and it was heavenly.
The short answer is this: I love ice cream. My favorite flavor is mint chocolate chip. As a kid, my mom would serve us ice cream in the evenings before bed … I have very fond memories of sitting in our living room and eating mint chocolate chip out of a mug almost every single evening. In fact, my memory of doing this is so strong that it was nearly an impossible habit for me to break for many, many years. I used to eat a good 1/2 gallon of ice cream per week - ha! I don’t eat much ice cream anymore… but not for any specific reason. Aaron and I really enjoy our yogurt and berries with granola in the evening.
Last year, we rode our motorcycles for a VERY SPECIAL ice cream trip… to Snow Goose Produce on Fir Island in Mount Vernon, Washington. Snow Goose Produce is known for their ‘immodest’ ice cream cones, which are so gigantic that they are practically an entire half gallon of ice cream stuffed onto a cone. The lines at Snow Goose are sometimes catastrophically long, but Aaron and I managed to arrive on a perfectly sunny day… with no line.
A few years ago, Rose and I woke up at 11:30 pm on July 4th (well, if I’m being honest… I didn’t sleep at all, even though I tried to take a nap). We drove to Sunrise at Mt. Rainier National Park, and we started hiking at 2am. Just before 5am we reached the 2nd Burroughs — a popular vista on the East side of the mountain. In the most pink dawn alpenglow I’ve ever experienced, we improvised amidst a wind storm.
On the way home from that trip, we stopped for ice cream at Wapiti Woolies. Amidst our sleep-deprived state of giddiness, we ate our ice cream for ‘breakfast’ in the car on our way home — feeling very much like we had seen a secret about the magic of the universe.
It’s funny, but I used to be very dependent on ice cream — I couldn’t possibly imagine not having it every single evening. It was a bit of a ‘comfort food’ for me — a memory of relaxing moments in my childhood where nothing else seemed to matter… except for enjoying the mint chocolate chip ice cream in my small mug (eaten with a miniature spoon, I might add). When I was in the midst of my intense phase of ‘counting my macros’ (protein/fats/carbs), I was completely and unhealthily obsessed with my food intake — and ice cream was on the ‘no’ list. Very sadly, I limited myself from foods that I enjoyed because I was so concerned about my ‘macros’ that I didn’t allow myself to eat a lot of food items.
As I ventured into intuitive eating, however, I started eating ice cream again — but this time, without a fear of it and also without a need for it. I don’t have the same dependency on ice cream or desert anymore — but I still enjoy it. For Aaron’s birthday this past year, we made ice cream sundaes… but I don’t even think we finished the ice cream. We had it for one evening… which was really fun… and that was it.
This summer, I’m looking forward to going back to Snow Goose Produce and eating another immodest ice cream cone. I hope that everybody reading this AMA today also finds a way to include some delicious ice cream into your life — I’d love to hear if you have any favorite brands on flavors!
Dear AMA,
Have you ever hitchhiked?
I’ve hitchhiked once in my entire life — and it was at Mt. Rainier National Park in Washington State - ha!
My good friend Brenda and I did a big loop in the Kautz Creek area that went through Indian Henry’s Hunting Ground. The loop ended at Longmire, about 3.5 miles from where we had parked our vehicle, and so we had a road walk back to our car, which was relatively miserable since it was November and we had been hiking in deep snow all day and we were wearing our mountaineering boots.
So, we decided to see if we could hitch a ride back to our car. It was pretty funny, because I was still a park ranger at the time — but I was actually in the process of waiting to find out when I was going to get laid off from my job (which I did). So, maybe that inspired my desire to act with a brief tinge of rebellion.
For the record, it is illegal to hitchhike in National Parks (as far as I can tell). I was able to come up with this article by PNW local Craig Romano, where he describes an encounter with a ranger at Mt. Rainier.
Luckily for me, my criminal ways went undetected, and my friend Brenda stuck her thumb out to passing cars as we wandered down the road in our stiff mountaineering boots… and finally, a minivan stopped to pick us up.
As luck would have it, it was the crew of an Air France plane who was on a 3 day layover in Seattle. They had rented a van and were sightseeing in their free time, and they were extremely excited to pick up these very strange hiking women in the National Park. Now, the best part of this experience was that there was no room in the van… so, we hopped into the trunk of the van — which absolutely felt sketchy and ridiculous, but I didn’t care, because I was really excited to be skipping the road walk.
Luckily, the crew from Air France turned out to be completely legit — they kindly dropped us off at our vehicle after taking photos of us… I think we were the highlight of their visit to Mt. Rainier.
Overall, my single hitchhiking experience was very positive. Would I do it again? Probably not — but, I’m also an optimist and I tend to assume that most people are kind… and guess what? They usually are.
Well friends, that’s it for this week’s AMA — thank you all for being here and for asking such fun questions — I hope that this week brings you a lot of joy, fun, ease, peace and abundance in surprising and wonderful ways. I’m so grateful for all of you!
Ice cream is my absolute favorite food! I'm obsessed! And it takes a lot of willpower to not eat some every day!
Hands down my favorite store bought ice cream is Tillamook Malted Moo. I could literally (and sometimes do) eat it everyday.